Twelve Things That Will Be Obsolete in 10 Years

Look, I found Grandma's old CD collection in the attic! ... Who's Justin Bieber?

I grew up in a household of professional music fans. No one could hold a tune, but there was always vinyl spinning, the Top Six at 6 on tape so that it might be enjoyed again and again, and Video Hits on the TV after school. At the tender age of seven, I was hustled to a Leif Garrett concert by my two sisters, who swore they were taking me because I wanted to go. A few nights ago, my sister and I were among the 75 women in attendance at Rush’s Time Machine Tour.

But even now, more than 20 years since its creation, I feel lukewarm at the prospect of a compact disc. I hated how disposable they felt, the crappy plastic jewel cases that always broke, the teeny, barely legible liner notes, and the reams of mediocre music artists would record because they had space for it. I thoroughly welcome the complete demise of the CD by the year 2020.

No one can blame labels for embracing the CD. At the time, it was considered technologically advanced. But in the end, it will be remembered for being a license to print money, as fan after fan scrambled to replace their vinyl collections. The sound was never that great, and the CD all but killed the 45 single, which did immeasurable damage to the music industry. Instead of being teased into buying an album based on a strong single, fans bought whole CDs and had to listen to song after boring song before they got to the hit track. When you’ve spent close to $20 on a disc that has one good song, who can blame you for downloading music illegally?

From a sound perspective, I’m not completely sold on digital downloads, and I confess when I’m feeling flush I do still buy CDs, mostly on impulse when I’m in my car. I’m anxious to see the music industry regenerate, and I love the vast choice that’s available now, but with a busier lifestyle, I find it hard to find good new music – it’s overwhelming.

Luckily, I heard of a great arts and crafts activity that uses old CDs. First, break the discs into a million pieces. Then, with a glue gun, affix each piece to Styrofoam ball until it’s completely covered. Stick a hook in the top, hang it from a string, and you’ve got yourself a disco ball. Is that ironic? Alanis, help me out.